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Name: Whei
Country: United States
State: California
Metro: San Francisco
Gender: Female
Interests: Looking for my Batman. Protecting endangered species.
Expertise: drawing with my eyes closed. (you WANT me on your team for cranium.) falling asleep and staying asleep.
Occupation: Engineering
Industry: Engineering
Message: message meEmail: email me
Member Since:
7/14/2002
 Lifetime
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| Try something new everyday |
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| Test your self confidence by chopping all your hair off. Do it. I dare you. |
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| Lola's Christmas Adventure!
While everyone likes to write Christmas/New Year's blogs reflecting on the last year and their goals and expectations for the next year... I decided I'll write about something simpler. All those so-called self-discovery blogs are the same, anyway. "So much has changed this year... blah blah blah... Time flies...." Yeah yeah yeah, what else is new? It'd be pretty damn boring if nothing changed the whole year. Talk about a lame life. So now onto the exciting things - I dogsat for Salley and I took her dog, Lola, for a Christmas Adventure!!
Lola is no ordinary Pekingese dog. She is an extremely special dog for many reasons:
1. She looks like an ewok.
2. She does not bark.
3. She does not jump onto furniture and she cannot jump down if she's put on furniture.
4. She ignores cats.
5. Did I mention she looks like an ewok?
So all in all, Lola is practically the perfect dog to dogsit! She gets lots of attention when I walk her, both from men and women, young and old.... "Awww she's so cute!" "OMG, that dog looks like an ewok, COOL!"
Her adventure first started at my work office. Lola is such a mellow quiet dog, I thought it'd be totally fine to bring her in and I didn't think anyone would notice. But surely enough, I underestimated the ewok factor, and I also didn't realize she snores like a wookie. Imagine the excitement and hullabaloo when I bring a dog that looks like an ewok into an office full of engineers. Then imagine the raised eyebrows when in a cubicle sea of socially inept, therefore quiet, engineers, there is a loud wookie-like snoring coming from my cube. I had no idea such a small animal (she is smaller than both of my cats, and one of my cats is a "runt") could produce such a loud noise, but damn it is pretty f*cking cute.
 
And man, engineers really do love anything associated with Star Wars. Never thought I'd see 200+lb manly men (do they really exist in the engineering world? We will leave that to another day) go ga-ga talking in cutesy voices to a lap dog b/c she looks like an ewok. And yes, some men even started talking like ewoks to her, which only garnered a blank stare from Lola. She has such a wrinkly, flat pokerface. What a bitch. While everyone is smiling and goo-ga-ing over her, she just stares blankly at you. Not even a tail wag. Ewok bitch. Cracks me up.
Yet Lola is so charismatic, I brought her with me everywhere. We went to the airport to drop Melissa off - Lola just crawled into my lap and fell asleep while I drove. Evidence that I'm a good asian woman driver. Ha.
I brought her into Nordstrom's at the SF shopping center for Christmas Eve shopping and walked right past the security guard who just smiled. I'm sure he was thinking, "That dog totally looks like an ewok!" In the shoe sale section, women even stopped SHOPPING to pet and talk about how cute Lola was. Nothing funnier than watching old rich wrinkly ladies talking in high pitched cutesy voices to an old wrinkly Pekingese giving them a blank stare back. Not even a tail wag. Ha, Lola the ewok bitch.
The best part of the adventure -- Lola went for a bike ride! I didn't bring her carrier (since I was not expecting to take her on the bike ride), but Lola is so chill and laid back, she was totally fine crawling into the Timbuk2 bag. Slung her onto my back and she poked her head out, caught some air... even little dogs like to feel the wind on their face. It's like they dream of being a long-legged dog that can run fast or stick their head out the car window without actually falling out of the car. Maybe that's why they're so yappy at big dogs. They're just jealous.
Rode into Golden Gate park where she just chilled out. Practically fell asleep on the pavement after the exciting 15 minute bike ride. Man, if only children were this easy, I'd have 10. Haha, just kidding.
Christmas Eve ended with Lola joining us for a gumbo and rack of lamb dinner. She had lots of lamb and was in all our cheesy Christmas tree pictures. She even watched Star Wars with us! Complete with her blank ewok pokerface. What an ewok bitch. A freaking cute ewok bitch.
Happy Holidays, everyone!! To 2010! 
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| I'm Home.
Some things never change, even after 5+ years of being in California, or even after 16 years since our family moved to this house. I wish I hadn't forgotten my camera so I could take evidence.
- The fridge and freezer are over-filled and over-stocked, even though there are only 3 people living in the house instead of 6.
- We have old tennis balls covering the corners of the computer desk, even though we have no young children in danger of hitting their heads in the house.
- There's an abundant supply of lychee jellies, even though we have no young children, but I suppose even as adults we love this stuff!
- My mom still has artwork from when I was in 4th grade on the walls.
- I still don't know how to operate the HDTV w/ the DVD and the Wii.
- My bed still has a ton of stuffed animals on it. Giant Kerokerokeroppi included.
- I still get into fights with my parents which result in yelling, crying, pouting, and eye-rolling. (no picture of that possible) But now we do it over shots of cognac instead of tea. (I could've taken a picture of that)
- My mom still cooks way too much food, but it's so good!
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| Why Women are Bitches #34893028
We don't want to admit that we've lost things. It was taken from us.
And it's always personal.
Even losing a deal or bargain feels like such a personal loss to us, as if we were taken advantage of. Women love to bargain, and often times it's just for the SAKE of bargaining. We don't LOSE the bargain - that freaking 3rd world country poor farmer woman STOLE and CHEATED us out of our 30 cents for a handmade woolen hat! No, we did not lose the bargain - we were robbed! A whole 30 cents!!
And regardless of whether we get the bargain or not, what does the old woman who handknit that hat and sold it to us say?
"Bitch!"
A woman we met from Australia in Bolivia over breakfast at the hostel was asking if we had seen a cell phone in the lobby. She said she lost a cell phone upon arriving in the hostel, and thinks she left it in the lobby during check-in or breakfast. Unfortunately none of us saw a cell phone, but we assured her we'd keep an eye out. 10 mins later, she's yelling at the Bolivian ladies at the front desk claiming her cell phone was stolen from her room, and it must have been the cleaning ladies. True, it could easily have happened, and I'm sure things get stolen from hostels ALL the time (I have been a victim of that myself), but just moments ago she admitted she lost or misplaced it. Not only that, she really was making such a fuss about it to the women with limited english. You don't go from admitting that YOU lost or misplaced your personal item to accusing someone of having stolen it.
What did we say as we left the hostel to enjoy La Paz?
"Bitch!"
Just to give you an image of what a bitch looks like, I'll describe the aforementioned woman as large and ugly. BUT, bitches come in all sizes, colors, and grades of attractiveness. Some may even argue that the higher grade of attractiveness, the higher the bitchy level.
How to avoid this common bitchy behavior? If you have nothing to lose, then nothing can be taken from you, and there is no reason to bitch about it.
So, in conclusion, I had nothing, lost nothing, and had nothing taken. I love the simple life.
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| I Put the NEW in New Zealand!
There are a few things that make me exude happiness from the inside, and New Zealand has quite a number of them: mountains, trees, oceans, rocks, and clouds. I swear, the clouds are more beautiful here. I love New Zealand; I imagine that it must be significantly better than just "Zealand," wherever that is, for it to have been named the NEW Zealand.
New is NOT always better (i.e. old stuff like snail mail, Volkswagen Corrados, and Sean Connery still rock the sh*t), but being the typical insatiable humans we are, we don't know that until we try it. Then we can decide whether we want to go back to the old stuff, or have both the old and the new, like Sean Connery and Brad Pitt at the same time.... haha, just kidding.
Not that I needed to go to NEW Zealand to try new things - I was never a person who needed an "excuse" to do something I want to do. But it definitely puts a positive association with my trip to New Zealand. This is how you train dogs. Obey command --> treat --> good. Disobey --> NO! --> no treat --> bad.
New Zealand --> new things --> fun --> good.
I haven't done a list in awhile, and I have enough new things to list, so here goes!
(1) Not a single relative or person commented on how dark I am.
This is breaking news. First of all, it's just a miracle b/c I happen to be very dark at the moment (literal chinese word for 'tan' or 'dark skinned' is black - yes that's what they call me). Secondly, it's winter in NZ so everyone else is pasty white... except for California me! Thirdly, they're all Taiwanese, meaning their standard of beauty for a woman is having light skin.
People have no idea how frustrating it is to be criticized for being tan, b/c following our train of associations: dark/tan --> ugly (or not beautiful + white) --> bad. Last year at Esther's wedding, I wore a gorgeous silk brown Vera Wang grecian goddess gown. I read a poem at her ceremony. I like to think I read it beautifully, and looked it too. During the reception, someone came up to me and said I looked naked b/c my skin is so dark it's the same color as my dress. YEAH, THANKS WOMAN!
My xanga profile pic is from that wedding. Was I really that dark? Do I really look naked? Well guess you can't see my dress that well in the picture.... anyways...
Look at all the women in this picture. I am the darkest. It's not even that bad, right?
So, in conclusion: New Zealand --> no comment about my darkness --> relatives are simply happy to see and spend time with me --> I'm not so ugly after all --> good.
(2) Bungee jumping at Taupo!
Fear of heights - almost nixed from climbing. Fear of direct exposure at high speeds - nixed w/ cycling. So what's next? BUNGEE JUMPING!! It was exhilarating, empowering, exciting, and any other positive descriptive word beginning with e. Drug associations come to mind, and you know what, it was probably pretty darn close. I wouldn't know, and frankly with things like bungee jumping, why would I need to know.
Milliseconds after feeling I was about to piss in my skinny jeans, I jumped without hesitation and wanted to scream, "FREEDOM!!!" Braveheart style, but I realized that would make no sense. Not like I'm jumping to escape anything - I am tethered to the platform. The thought that my scream sounds ugly also crossed my mind.
Unfortunately I don't have pictures (yet) but when I get them, I will post. There is also a video, which upon initial viewing looks impressive b/c I seem absolutely fearless jumping off, and almost elegant in my relaxed form... until I bounce back up and for the moments frozen in time when I'm suspended before falling again. At that moment of silent suspension, you see me flailing and waving my arms like a bird who has lost all its feathers and trying to fly. It's very sad. It was a primal instinct.
This is where I jumped off from. 47m.
New Zealand --> bungee jumping --> MAJOR COJONES (not literally, but figuratively... somehow BOOBIES or BREASTS just don't have the same effect/meaning as BALLS) --> base jumping or sky diving will be next --> very good.
(3) I didn't fight with my Mom once.
Not a single time in SIX days. I think that's a new record. In celebration, I will post a picture of a super cute lamb sucking my finger. B/c looking at this picture will evoke warm fuzzies, also associated with daughters getting along with their mothers. If it doesn't, you're just really evil.
New Zealand --> no fights with Mom --> cute lamb sucking on my finger --> warm fuzzies --> very very good.
P.S. I still think lamb is delicious, esp New Zealand lamb. They are divinely delicious AND charmingly cute. Vegetarians, what more could a lamb ask for???
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| Why Women are Bitches #248.
This entry can also be called, "Why I have no female friends." It is because women are bitches. Myself included. Frankly, I don't know how men put up with us. They must really love having sex with us.
So why are women bitches?
We love to have the last word. We must comment and opine on everything. We must make our thoughts known, even if it's completely unnecessary, overly critical, pointless, and for lack of a better word, bitchy. This entry itself is a prime example.
Being an engineer with mostly male friends, sometimes I forget about this bitchiness in women, and frankly, my bitchiness doesn't emerge much amongst my male friends. They don't bring it out of me like women do. It's like how womens' menstrual cycles are tied together - our bitchiness is tied together. How convenient. The more the bitchier. It's natural; everyone knows bitches (female dogs) don't get along, but put a male and female dog together, and they can play happily. Bitchiness is in nature, just like homosexuality - a natural truth many do not want to accept.
Like every other woman, I enjoy a shopping day here and there, but I forgot what it was like shopping with women other than my sister. I often (1) shop online, (2) shop alone, or (3) shop with my mother or sister. Those are the only 3 scenarios in which I shop. Sunday was an anomaly, I guess since I was driving 2 of my closest girl friends (M and C) back from camping, and since we are traveling together in September to Peru, figured we might make a shopping spree together for the trip. Boy, I learned I need to spend more time with them before we travel together.
All women are self conscious of their weight. The fat ones and the skinny ones. The athletes and the couch potatoes. We all care. Don't deny it. Even though I tell myself I'm pretty satisfied with how I look b/c I'm happy with my lifestyle, I sure wish I was thinner. Haha. So upon seeing a purple silk dress that I liked but totally didn't need (even giving myself the excuse I could use a dress for the wedding this weekend), I was dismayed they didn't have my size. They had one size smaller, or two sizes larger. I have a few dresses in the smaller size, so I figured I might give it a shot.
M retorts, "Don't split it!" I laughed, and said, "I know, if it doesn't fit, then I won't get it, that's all. I need to save money, anyway."
I couldn't zip the last 1.5 inches. Since the dress was $69, and I'm a cheapo, I didn't want to try too hard and I didn't see it as a huge loss since it wasn't that cheap anyway. I brought it out, with M waiting eagerly to see me come out with it, and I said, "I couldn't zip it all the way up."
She scoffed, "Ha, I knew it, I could've told you that!"
My reaction in my head was, "Damn, what a fucking bitch." Women LOVE made snide comments. What was the point of that last statement? I already acknowledged it wasn't exactly my size, but I do own clothing in that size, so it wasn't extraordinary or completely delusional to try it on. And being a woman myself, her bitchiness almost spurred me to retort with a comment on her size and weight. I held back though, b/c M has diabetes and it would just downright be wrong. I mean, that would make me not only a bitch, but an evil bitch. M is known to be bitchy and moody, but I wasn't going bring that up on a freaking shopping trip. Just not worth my time. The shopping AND the bitching.
I thought hard about what a guy would say, and honestly a guy would've said nothing. Or a guy wouldn't have gone shopping at all, and no one would be there to accompany me and make snide comments about my dress size. How simple. The beauty of men. I love them. Women are such bitches.
*sigh* And I have 2 weeks of traveling with M + C. Good luck to me. Look out for entries called, "Why I Travel Alone or with my Male Friends #439208" in the future....
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